Friday, November 1, 2013

Happy

The beginnings of my days have a comforting sameness to them. Vera (at least) and maybe Ella or Dean or Emma come in to snuggle with me in my comfy bed. Some days we fall back asleep together and sometimes we chat a bit. We say, "I love you" a whole lot. We talk about upcoming birthdays and holidays and adoption anniversaries--all the highlights of our life. I get and give loads of kisses and hugs and occasionally receive the unintentional elbow to the gut. 

I could hardly love it more.

Part of this morning's conversation was very simple yet brought up so much joy, so many thoughts, so much thankfulness. 

Mommy: Vera, are you happy?
Vera (smiling with her whole body): yes.

She IS happy. She's also grumpy and stubborn and kind and mischievous and sad and friendly and even maternal. But she is happy. And I am grateful to the bottom of my soul that she is able to experience that range of emotions, those family celebrations, those snugly mornings with mommy.

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. Funny thing, adoption: I never remember my children are adopted, but I never forget, either. So when I ask Vera if she is happy, I'm asking someone who is fully, completely, unreservedly my daughter. And when she says she is happy, I think of where she could be, what her life would be like, if she would already be living in a Russian mental institution, if she would even still be alive. 

So for the millionth time I squeeze her a little tighter, but she is still just as much my beloved daughter as she was before. And I thank God for the millionth time for giving her to me, and I feel more like His beloved daughter than ever before. And I am reminded again that His purpose in adoption is to present to us a picture of His adoption, of our secure place in His family, of the great Love He lavishes upon us. 

I am so happy He did.